Friday, August 17, 2007

A Clockwork Orange

I'm glad that "the people who think" that we, the unwashed masses, are incapable of taking care of ourselves - I'm glad that they think we need to be protected from the narcissists and psychopaths among us.

On that, I couldn't agree with them more. I don't maintain this website and blog because I have nothing more profitable to do with my time. I do it because of the long line of ruined lives in every narcissist's wake through life. Ruined lives. Utterly, utterly ruined lives.

If you could weigh in a scale all the untold misery their kind bring to this world, surely the planet would sink like a stone in the waters of time.

Narcissists/psychopaths are a curse on humankind. They are destroying machines. That's because they are predators, and like all predators they sustain themselves by ripping apart others.

I don't like the math. To keep one creep happy, dozens, hundreds, thousands, or even millions (depending on how much power the narcissist gets) have to have ruined lives. I say "nuts" to that. Let the one creep be unhappy instead. Very unhappy. Very, very unhappy. Yes, I say, let the vampires among us starve.

Oooh, how nasty of me, eh? Well, at least I'm on the right side. Whose side are the authorities on? the side of the vampires? or their prey?

Let's give the bishops of the Roman Catholic Church a break: they are no worse than the rest of society in betraying us to them ... to the point of feeding us to them. The mental health industry does no better. Neither does the law. They and the bystanders are a miserable failure.

Who loves ya, babe? Certainly not them.

They love their power and authority and advocate anything that will increase it. They are so narcissistic themselves that the last thing I want to see is them suckering us into giving them the kind of power and authority they think their kind should have over us.

We don't need A Clockwork Orange to protect us from the narcissists and psychopaths among us.

We need nothing but information and good, old fashioned self reliance. Why? Because narcissists and psychopaths are predators. That's both the bad news and the good news about them. Predators are almost never a threat to prey aware of their presence.

Unconcerned impalas drink at the same watering hole the lions do. In peace. Why? Because the impalas smell the bloody lions and keep their distance! A lion beyond striking distance is a lion that is no threat.

What's more, predators are easily discouraged, because they can't afford to be injured in a fight. An injury would handicap them in trying to obtain future meals and thus bring about their death through starvation. Hence predators take "testing runs" at large prey and head off in search of easy prey if the victim fights back.

Narcissists and psychopaths do the same thing. They live in dread of exposure for what they are. If they should be unmasked in their Pathological Space, they would have to flee it and establish a new hunting ground among unsuspecting prey in a new environment. So they ALWAYS test their prey. If they see that you are suspicious of them, they leave you alone.

This is true no matter what kind of predator a narcissist or psychopath is. The pedophile priest tests his prey. The street con artist tests his prey. The love thief tests his prey. The abusive boyfriend tests his prey. They all want to make sure their prey is clueless before they attack.

In other words, they want to make sure their prey doesn't suspect a wolf underneath the sheep's clothing. They are scared to death of people they fear are wise to them. What if such a person should sound a general warning and report the first punishable thing they do? That narcissist or psychopath would be in deep trouble, as the rest of herd chimes in and others start spilling their guts about what he has already done to them.

And so the cure for the curse of narcissists and psychopaths among us is an informed society, one that knows that predators exist among us, that we all encounter them every day, and that we must take care of ourselves - not expect Mother State to.

A hundred years ago, people weren't so childish as they are today. People didn't trust strangers. They paid attention to signs of bad faith and heeded the warning in them. They were not clueless, naive babes in Wonderland who thought everyone is a good person. They didn't look to Mother Government to sterilize society for them so that they could gambol about like lambs in May in an environment all the wolves have been removed from.

Narcissists do behave in the presence of witnesses. Punishment and other adverse consequences is the only language they understand. So think what would happen in a world where getting away with murder was hard. What if narcissists couldn't easily get away with character assassination and abuse all their lives? What if they usually got shamed and punished for it instead?

What if they lived in a world where 99% of people weren't so naive? The vampires would starve, wouldn't they?

So, we don't need A Clockwork Orange. All we need is an informed society. A society that knows that 15-20% of people meet the criteria for at least one personality disorder and that psychopaths and narcissists are as plentiful in our world as big cats are in the wilds of Africa.

In other words, we need the social engineers to quit keeping the facts a secret from us. We need these arrogant ones to quit regarding knowledge as dangerous in our hands. What is this? A new brand of clericalism - secular clericalism - or what?

Hey, so much for their argument that we would overreact and be mean to narcissists and psychopaths if we knew the truth - THEY are the ones ballistically overreacting by proposing A Clockwork Orange, not us.

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At 9:07 AM, Blogger The Pig King said...

I liked your blog. To defeat monsters you must become a monster.

At 11:31 AM, Blogger Kathy said...

That's what the social engineers are doing with their Clockwork Orange ideas. But I didn't say you had to do that. I don't know where you got that idea. An impala doesn't become a lion by simply being wary of one.

Oh, wait, I mentioned fighting back. Buzz. Do you susbscribe to the secular creed that fighting back is evil? Just as evil as attacking you was? Self defense against a monster makes you a monster? I think you'd better rethink that.

At 3:54 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

To defeat monsters you must "acknowledge" you are up against a monster. Not your "friend",not your "sibling".not your "parent" etc.. This is where the "N" gains the advantage over you. They rely on your own "goodness" and compassion to back-off or give in and "go along to get along". WRONG! Do not allow yourself to be manipulated by your OWN feelings. These are not the people you think they are. It is a hard concept to grasp when it's your "brother" etc. But as Kathy says they are predators and do not have the same love or compassion for you as you do for them.They MUST destroy you. It is for them inate. Separation is the only cure or immediate retaliation (verbally) to stop them in their tracks. This is the part that us optimists have a hard time grasping. We think that we can find a way to win them over or they will change their way. It ain't happening.

At 2:37 PM, Blogger The Pig King said...

I don't think we are talking about the same thing. That's where our confusion for both of us. When I say monster I mean murderer. Not people that manipulate people. We are all narcissists. And it is healthy. But when monster try to destroy us we must think like they do and destroy them first by using our wits. That's what I meant by becoming a monster. I was too vague with my first comment. Sorry.

At 2:46 PM, Blogger Kathy said...

I get it. Thanks for so graciously clearing that up. Actually, I'm sorry. I should have known there was more to it than your comment seemed to say.

At 3:55 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think that the psychiatric industry has pre-groomed a lot of people to be fooled by these monsters. Popularization of a kind of therapy culture has sucked the average person into believing crap. It's all predicated on an understanding that people are all good and if someone does something terrible they just need some understanding and hand-holding and it will all be okay.

This goes back to the point that Robert Hare makes about psychopaths. It's the reason he developed the psychopathy checklist. You never, never rely on self reporting when judging them. Only on objective, observable fact.

Yes, like the crocodile that convinces the gingerbread man that he will do him no harm if the gingerbread man jumps on croc's back for a ride, the psychopath will say whatever it takes to get what it wants.

Objective, observable fact.

And if you don't know a person enough to have these facts you'd better find out who they are before you get too involved.

At 10:54 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I fought back and then ran. I allowed myself to stop caring if the narcissist would label me as being just like him. I blasted him with full force for having ruined MY life.

I realized that it was MY life that was ruined not his and therefore I had a right to sound furiously angry with him. He would use this to point out of course that my anger was "out of control" but, I had to not care. I took a swipe at his nose like a cat would do to a dog, I turned around and fought back knowing it was the end and I was getting out. Who cared WHAT he would make of it, or make it into for the benefit of his storyline with the new supply. For his own benefit. I told him the truth about himself which is the worst thing you can do to a narcissist.

You have to know if you expose them it's the end of you for them. What of it? I am glad I stood up to him. I am glad I took back my power and fought back. If the lion is already on your back with it's jaws latched around your neck you do what you have to and get the hell away from him. The poor little narcissist might get hurt when you do this. But if you don't he'll devour you. You have no choice except to fight him off of you and then run.

It doesn't mean this is our usual way of being in the world. It means we were entangled with a monster and reacted to save ourselves. Ruined lives indeed. They get it ALL and get away with it. My little swipe at the narcissist certainly barely left a mark. I am the one left to pick up all the pieces and heal my wounds. He has an audience around him to soothe his so called pains. Oh, the lies of omission that are told about me now. The half truths to get pity.

Those who now collaborate with him despite having been warned. Well, I used to care about what they were in for. No more. Stupidity and blindness. I HAD no warning or anyone to let me know what I was about to go through. And now I've lost so much that all I can afford to do is warn them once and move on. What was made of my warning? They repeated it word for word to the narcissist and caused me further harm in doing so, even though they were told it would be dangerous if they repeated it, for me because he is an abuser. And this is an institution that is supposed to be there to help people? That HE now works for?? I guess that help doesn't extend to abused women then. Only users.

I have no pity and maybe that is part of how the narcissist rubbed off on me. I don't feel comfortable in that skin either but, you have to go into survival mode for a while. The therapist, the co workers, the narcissist and his collaborators are on their own.

You don't get to fight back against a psychopath and win, the best you can do is to escape with your life at all. Too bad I wasn't believed. I sometimes wonder what I will say if any of them come back in the future and say "you were right about him" They fed me to the dog and didn't even look back, they stood on his side of the gate with him and helped him to abuse me further. They plead ignorance in the face of facts.

You don't have to become a monster to fight one all you have to do to fight this monster is tell the bald truth to them and about them. It makes them shrink like the witch melts from water.

Thanks Kathy. Keep telling on them and about them. I believe you. I was there. You are telling the absolute truth!


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