Nipping Narcissism in the Bud
My last post shows why I think it's so important not to be obtuse to the NATURE of the things narcissists do to people (and any living thing at their mercy).
It's unnatural. If you think about it, you can see that it's worse than what many street criminals do. For, many street criminals don't do what they do just to hurt others. What they do is wrong and unjustified but not unnatural.
For example, take someone down and out who robs a liquor store for cash. He is very nervous. The owner makes a sudden move that makes him think he is going for an alarm or a gun. He kills the owner.
Wrong. But he didn't kill the owner just to kill the owner. He didn't leave him to slowly bleed to death, either. He didn't rob the liquor store just to trash the place. He did what he did for reasons that we can understand.
He didn't rob his best friend's liquor store, either, just because that friend was "stupid" enough to trust him.
Dante, for example, was in line with the theologians of his day, when he put the souls of the twisted in the lowest pit of Hell, because their acts were both cruel and treacherous, betraying sacred trusts, the trust of people with every good reason to trust them.
Such are unconscionable acts. In other words, conscience cannot accommodate them.
Therefore, I think it is crucial to reach a budding narcissist at an early age. before they pass that point of no turning back.
I have seen cases of parents who make light of their child torturing an animal or bullying another child at school or flying at a brother or sister with windmilling fists. That parent just did not want to know that something was seriously amiss with that child. Instead of dealing with the problem appropriately, they just "had a talk with" him or her.
They said, "S/he is just a kid," as if the age of the doer determines the blackness of the deed. It doesn't.
They said, "All kids do stuff like that." Wrong. Most kids don't do stuff like that.
When children are not yet ready to deal with their actions on a moral level, you must let simple punishment do the "talking." It deters. It keeps them from crossing the line before they are mature enough to morally regulate their behavior.
I think it can nip a budding narcissist in the bud and give him or her a chance to grow up into a normal, mentally healthy adult.
That is no guarantee, of course, but I sure like that kid's chances better this way. Don't you?
narcissistic personality disorder narcissism