Malignant Narcissism

If you are new to "What Makes Narcissists Tick," I urge you to see the Main Site, especially "The Essence of Narcissism" and "The Danger of NPD." otherwise it's easy to miss the forest for the trees.

The bottom line is that, to support their pain-killing delusions, malignant narcissists just pretend they are true. They also train everyone around them to play along. How? By simply making your world as obnoxious as a raging three-year-old throwing a temper tantrum makes it, if you say or do anything that reminds the narcissist that he isn't a god.

Narcissists play that part by pretending that THEY are all-important, just as a three-year-old does. This means that they must pretend they deserve all available attention.

Which means that you must get none. So, they pretend you should get none. No hearing. No affection. No consideration. No deference. No respect. No compassion. No praise. No thanks. No regard. - Let's just sum it up to say that you must get no form of ATTENTION.

Like a fly on the wall, compared to God Almighty.

Now, anyone who thinks it's no big deal to be treated like that deserves a daily dose of that treatment for awhile. Let's just say that it would be an "educational experience" for them.

This is where many people fail to think the next logical thought. What does it mean if you think no one else should get any of this stuff? that you must have it all?

It means that you fight to keep others from getting any and that you attack others to take it away from them.

That is malignance.

So, if a co-worker is getting praise for doing an excellent job, you must put a stop to that. You must bring him down.

That is malignance.

Or, if your child acts like she deserves your attention, you must give her the kind of attention she will never want again.

That is malignance.

That co-worker and that child have a right to what they have and want. They NEED the credit due them for their work and they NEED to be treated as worthy of attention. They NEED these things as much as people NEED the food they eat and the air they breathe.

But a narcissist doesn't want them to have these things they need. Is he any different then than someone who tries to keep another person from getting any food?

Why not be humane and use a gun? Why kill this cruel way?

Get it? NPD is just a thousand ways of doing this - a thousand ways of denying others their needs and due.

Because the narcissist is a pig who has just gotta have it all.

Hence NPD is inherently pathologically envious of others. It is inherently hostile to the needs, rights, feeling, and well being of others. It is fiercely competitive with others over every scrap of respect, credit, regard, sympathy, affection, and all other forms of ATTENTION.

Because NPD must have it all. Which is to say that NPD must deny or take away from others everything that makes people feel good about themselves.

That is malignance.

No, unless they happen to be President-for-Life, people with NPD don't dare treat everyone that way. They are like all predators: they target easy prey. So, ordinarilly, they don't go after their boss, for example. Like any predator they lay in the weeds watching the herd, looking for easy prey. Once a vulnerable prospect gets caught within range and in their sights, CHARGE!

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